What do you see?
This poem surfaced when the old lady died in the geriatric ward of
Ashludie Hospital, near Dundee, that she had left nothing of any
value. Then the nurse going through her possessions found a poem.
The quality of this so impressed the staff that copies were
duplicated and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.
The woman's only bequest to posterity has since appeared in the
Beacon House News Magazine of the Northern Ireland Association for
Mental Health, and also in Barrow Hospital's The Barrow Broadsheet.
What do you see?
What do you see nurses, what do You see?
Are you thinking when you are Looking at me -
A crabbit old woman, not very Wise,
Uncertain of Habit, with far-away Eyes.
Who dribbles her food and makes No reply
When you say in a loud voice -- "I do wish you'd try."
Who seems not to notice the Things that you do.
And forever is losing a stocking Or a shoe.
Who unresisting or not, lets you Do as you will.
With bathing and feeding, the long day to fill.
Is that what you are thinking -- Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse, you're Not looking at me.
I'll tell you who I am as I sit Here so still:
As I use at your bidding, as I eat At your will,
I'm a small child of ten with a Father and mother,
Brothers and sisters, who love one Another.
A young girl of sixteen with wings On her feet.
Dreaming that soon now a lover She'll meet;
A bride soon at twenty - my heart Gives a leap.
Remembering the vows that I Promised to keep;
At twenty-five now I have young Of my own,
Who need me to build a secure, Happy Home;
A woman of thirty, my young now Grow fast,
Bound to each other with ties that Should last;
At forty, my young sons have Grown and are gone,
But my man's beside me to see I don't mourn.
At fifty, once more babies play Round my knee.
Again we know children, my loved One and me.
Dark days are upon me, my Husband is dead,
I look at the future, I shudder With dread.
For my young are all rearing Young of their own.
And I think of the years and the Love that I've known.
I'm an old woman now and nature Is cruel -
Tis her jest to make old age look Like a fool.
The body it crumbles, grace and Vigor depart
There is now a stone where I once Had a heart:
But inside this old carcass a young Girl still dwells.
And now and again my battered Heart swells.
I remember the joys, I remember The Pain.
And I'm loving and living life Over again.
I think of the years all too few - Gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact that Nothing can last.
So open your eyes, nurses, open And see
Not a crabbit old woman, look Closer -- see ME!
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